don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
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went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
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He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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