Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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