we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I believe in your delicious
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
