I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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