he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Randomize
