I want to have your abortion
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
