how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
