ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
