Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Randomize