This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
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