He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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