Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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