why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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