No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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