Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
