"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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