but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
