i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize
