accomplished twins. life is a go
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
