i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
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