what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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