i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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