so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
