Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize