Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
