We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
