She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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