Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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