nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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