'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
