Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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