why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize