never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Text me some of your sweat
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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