i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
