I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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