Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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