Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
