i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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