is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
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