It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
