I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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