Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
