She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
