soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
whose parrot is this?
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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