Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
