Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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