I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
it's great music for shaving your balls
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
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