spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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