you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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