im drinking this country out of the recession.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize